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1. |
I DM
03:56
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VERSE 1:
The Dungeon Masters... in my field
I’d look to them for how to feel
Use deprecation as a shield
While I hid all my game ideas
HOOK:
Was unqualified when I began to lead you!
I had lows and highs the same as queens do!
But I’ve realized in books and dreams, too!
A wizard arrives just when she means to!
CHORUS:
I DM, I DM! I… D… M…!
Y’all can’t wait ‘til I say: “Let’s begin!”
When I’m hit... by my demons
Now I know... how to free ‘em ‘cause:
I DM!
VERSE 2:
Comparin’ is done. The job is showing up.
Deciding what to do with time that’s given us.
I want to DM! And that means I'm enough!
To share the stories we’ve all got in us!
{HOOK}
{CHORUS}
{INSTRUMENTAL BREAK}
Was unqualified when I began to lead you!
I had lows and highs the same as queens do!
But I’ve realized in books and dreams, too!
A wizard arrives just when she means to!
I DM, I DM! I… D… M…!
Y’all can’t wait ‘til I say: “Let’s begin!”
When I’m hit... by my demons
Now I know... how to free ‘em ‘cause:
I DM, I DM! I… D… M…!
We’re our own heroes so let’s be ‘em!
Gonna keep on believin’
That I’m here for a reason… ‘cause:
I DM!
A wizard arrives precisely when she means to.
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2. |
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Conjure-Abjure-Divination, Transmute-Illuse-Evocation
Doin' fine, but now we can't forget Necro and Enchant
WELCOME TO! The School of Magic School!
It’s the School of Magic School!
CONJURATION!!
Teleporting there and back, Mighty Fortress, Acid Splash
Like a rabbit from a hat, You pull stuff right out of thin air
ABJURATION!!
This school will protect your people from forces both
good and evil
Blade Ward, Antimagic Field, You can stop from getting ki-illed
DIVINATION!!
School for wet elves who are hot, Legend Lore and
Detect Thoughts
Put your DM on the spot, See the future of their plot
TRANSMUTATION!!
Frogs and Princes with a twist, Changing things from
that to this
Fly, Jump, Etherealness, Call me Madame Alchemist
WELCOME TO The School of Magic School!
It’s the School of Magic School!
Detect magic is the cruelest
Yes it’s magic, but what school, miss?
Poison Spray to Simulacrum
Memorize only 8 of them
Conjure-Abjure-Divination, Transmute-Illuse-Evocation
Doin' fine, but now we can't forget Necro and Enchant
WELCOME TO! The School of Magic School!
It’s the School of Magic School!
LLUSION!!
Disguise Self, Greater Invis, Take that away from your lips!
They are giving you the biz, That’s not what you think it is
EVOCATION!!
Famous wizards’ alma mater, If you cast with force and ardor
Earth, air, fire and the water, Looks like you’re an evocateur
NECROMANCY!!
Life to death, and death to life, Resurrect, Chill Touch and Blight
Demons will applaud your might, Tell you, “Notice me, Senpai!”
ENCHANTMENT!!
Gaslight and manipulate, Mess around with mental states
Crown of Madness, Sleep and Bane, How big is your
Wisdom Save?
WELCOME TO! The School of Magic School!
It’s the School of Magic School!
Detect magic is the cruelest
Yes it’s magic, but what school, miss?
Poison Spray to Simulacrum
Memorize only 8 of them
Conjure-Abjure-Divination, Transmute-Illuse-Evocation
Doin' fine, but now we can't forget Necro and Enchant
WELCOME TO! The School of Magic School!
It’s the School of Magic School!
Conjure is to make, and Divine is to know
Kinetic expense, elements, well students, that’s Evoke!
Transmute is to change, and Abjure is protect
Hell, it’s an Illusion spell, consider yourself tricked!
Halloween-y stuff is always Necromance
Control, convince, and influence is from School of Enchants
Detect magic is the cruelest
Yes it’s magic, but what school, miss?
Poison Spray to Simulacrum
Memorize only 8 of them
Conjure-Abjure-Divination, Transmute-Illuse-Evocation
Doin' fine, but now we can't forget Necro and Enchant
WELCOME TO! The School of Magic School!
It’s the School of Magic School! (x3)
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3. |
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What if I wrote you a song?
Would that be wrong of me?
A present right off the bat
What would you think of that?
What if I wrote you a song?
I know that you and I have only just met
This might be forward, but I can’t help it
I’m not quite sure of what I want to say
I’ll write one anyway
I want to write you a song
I wanna write you a song
Would that turn you on or off?
A present right off the bat
What would you think of that?
What if I wrote you a song?
I’m through with doing what you’re supposed to do
I’m trusting instincts when it comes to you
The prettiest path to take is clear to see
a simple melody
I want to write you a song
I want to write you a song
And you can’t stop me, no
No, you don’t have a choice
And you might decide to drop me
But who can stop a voice from singing?
I already wrote you a song
Was that wrong of me?
A present right off the bat
What did you think of that
I already wrote you a song
I already wrote you a song
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4. |
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I gave you a nice comfy bed to rest in with plenty of chances
All you gave me was questions with fewer answers
Like how could you do this? And why? I guess it’s clear as day, it’s
Easy to see the writing… on your too-many faces
So stop pretending. I know you want to end me. Ohhhh
CHORUS:
You give a whole new meaning to die, A whole new meaning to die
You stand right in my way every time I wanna play
You give a whole new meaning to die (x2)
Since we're talkin' about meanings, let's talk about the meanin' of the word "mean." That's you my friend... that's you...
I made the mistake... to count on you
You must have waited to show your colors true
You never talk, so I never knew your soul
You might be a rock, but I’d rather roll ya
Does it hurt to lie... like that on your side? Ohhhh
{CHORUS}
Yeah, that's right
All along, I thought it was bad luck
Maybe I did something wrong, oh maybe I was stuck
But you were laughing at me this whole time
Now you’re gonna get a smacking, right in your snake eyes
You give a whole new meaning to die, A whole new meaning to die
You don’t wanna see me live, and you sure don’t wanna give
You give a whole new meaning to die
You give a whole new meaning to die, A whole new meaning to die
You’ve shown me how you felt, I can’t wait to watch you melt
You give a whole new meaning to die (x3)… yeehaw!
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5. |
Tornado Jail
03:40
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CHORUS:
Tornado jail, tornado jail
I wonder if he’ll ever make tornado bail.
L-O-L. Epic fail. Oh well. Tornado jail!
I’m watching questions spin in my tornado mind.
Like how’s a jail specifically torna-designed?
And couldn’t he have simply been tornado fined?
Is it wrong or is it the tornado grind?
{CHORUS}
Aren’t tornadoes made of just tornado air?
How’d they lock him all up in tornado there?
It doesn’t seem to me to be tornado fair.
No one can be bothered to tornado care.
{CHORUS}
You say tornado, and I say tornah-do
Let’s call the whole thing
losing the tornado lotto (x4)
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6. |
Behold Her Dreams
02:52
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Oh I see about a million smiling faces
It breaks my heart to hear that hers was fake
She didn’t know she wanted
Something else from life
She’s been asleep, but now she is awake
She dabbled in the life that others gave her
I don’t know how the shell of her survived
So stifled and so stagnant
We just didn’t see
How bright she’d shine if she could come to life
Behold her dreams!
Larger than life!
Borne of her joy and all the magic that she’s got inside
Possible? Or fantasy?
Looks like they’re both of those
And everything that’s in between
She’s hidden them longer than it seems!
But now they're ready! Behold her dreams!
No no no, she will not believe
This is it, she's shot her shot
And oh oh oh, she can now achieve
Something better, no she won’t stop
Behold her dreams!
Larger than life!
Borne of her joy and all the magic that she’s got inside
Possible? Or fantasy?
Looks like they’re both of those
And everything that’s in between
She’s hidden them longer than it seems!
But now they're ready! Behold her dreams!
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7. |
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Fall in love with yourself
Go above and beyond
Get naughty sexy dirty with it
Make yourself turn yourself on
Yeah I’m serious
Love the person you are
Stare at a selfie and get busy
Go a little bit too far
It’s huge, but small! It’s your first step
To fall in love at all, fall in love with yourself!
Take good care of yourself
Brains and bodies are odd
Ask all the questions of yourself
A vet might ask you of your dog
Like what did you eat?
Are you getting outside?
How often do you see your friends, and
Tell me what your poop looks like
It’s plain, but good! It’s how you can help!
So do the things you should! And take good care of yourself!
Maybe it’s easy for me to be singing this song about living your life.
But I’m pretty smart and I’ve been through the thick of it, so freakin’ do it, alright?
Go nuts and treat yourself
Take it easy and flex
Throw out the scratchy toilet paper
Get the moisturized Kleenex
Yeah, open your mouth
Up at the register
Say, “Add the avocado for a
Dollar twenty-five extra!”
It’s strange, but fun! So if you are compelled
To act like number one! Go nuts and treat yourself! (x3)
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8. |
Fly Home
03:42
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Looking up far away
Holding shadows at bay
The stars! They glimmer on high
They are mighty and brave
Although tiny they stay
They shine, bid darkness goodbye
The dark veil’s holding me
Waiting alone
All who wicked be
Fly, fly home
Fly home, fly home, fly home, fly home
The dark veil’s holding me. Fly, fly home
Looking down at my feet
Keeping nature on beat
The flowers! The joy of the earth
Although fragile and weak
They allay spirits bleak
They bloom, eclipsing their worth
The dark veil’s holding me
Waiting alone
All who wicked be
Fly, fly home
Fly home, fly home, fly home, fly home
All who wicked be. Fly, fly home
The dark veil’s holding me. Fly, fly home
Fly home, fly home, fly home, fly home
All who wicked be. Fly, fly home
They are mighty and brave
Although tiny they stay
They shine, bid darkness goodbye
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9. |
Missing You
03:11
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I miss the way your spirit made mine come alive
But now it’s up to me, and hey, we get there sometimes
I only lie a bit when I say, “Doin’ just fine”
Still going strong on missing you and wishing you sunshine
I wish that I could run into ya at a cafe
A simple “hi” could start undoing all of this pain
Or maybe it would feel like a cruel twist of fate
Still going strong on missing you and wishing you’re okay
Who knows what happens next?
How long does a cocoon take to blossom?
Whatever happens next
I hope it’s gonna be awesome!
Been spending time recalling all the stuff that we’ve done
I also can remember all our plans still to come
I wonder when my “now” will have our future outrun
Still going strong on missing you and wishing you love
I don’t wanna be happy, 'cause it’s like moving on
A chapter ending means another chapter’s begun
But right now, turning pages doesn’t sound like much fun
Still going strong on missing you and wishing you freedom
Who knows what happens next?
How long does a cocoon take to blossom?
Whatever happens next
I hope it’s gonna be awesome!
Of all the songs I have floating around in my head
I hate that this “I Miss You” ode’s the one that you get
You know, I’ve got more loving notes I’m leaving unsaid
Still going strong on missing you and wishing you the best
I'm still going strong on missing you and wishing you the best
Ohhh Ooooh
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10. |
You Found Me
04:04
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You’re sitting in your gaming shop, it’s just another day
You pull out your dice and you’re ready to play
All the regulars are there, the bell rings on the door
A lady’s voice asks you if you could use one more
You look up to say yes; it’s love at first sight
You go to one knee, and I agree that it’s right
You found me! (You found me!) You found me! (You found me!) A D&D-playing girl!
You found me! (Haha) You found me! (I’m right here) A D&D-playing girl!
Call your mom and stop looking for the perfect woman because you have found her!
I’m so glad to hear that you’re already sold
‘Cause I’ve been called a few things like sex offender and pyro
I tied up a guy who owed me money and left him to rot
But is it really all that bad if I never got caught?
I can’t wait for you to experience my sociopathy
And could you look down there and tell me what these bumps might be?
You found me! (You found me!) You found me! (You found me!) A D&D-playing girl!
You found me! (Yeah, you did!) You found me! (Go you!) A D&D-playing girl!
Call your mom and stop looking for the perfect woman because you have found… her!
I get it, you’re scared. As true love goes, I’m your first
But just remember: You weren’t coerced
And I won’t let you go, so I guess you’ve got to trust
That my weird heart has enough love for both of us
(I love you… and you love me… yeah, you do)
I found you! (I found you!) I found you! (I found you!) And I’ll never let you go!
I found you! (I did it!) I found you! (You’re right there!) And I’ll never let you go!
You can run for the rest of your life I’ll find you
There aren’t any takebacks after you say “I do”
I seem to recall you said your life was mine, too
Guess how I feel about being lied to
Not very good, but we can grind through
This, grab a glass, raise it high… imbibe to the fact... that I... found you!
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11. |
I DM (Acoustic)
03:46
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VERSE 1:
The Dungeon Masters... in my field
I’d look to them for how to feel
Use deprecation as a shield
While I hid all my game ideas
HOOK:
Was unqualified when I began to lead you!
I had lows and highs the same as queens do!
But I’ve realized in books and dreams, too!
A wizard arrives just when she means to!
CHORUS:
I DM, I DM! I… D… M…!
Y’all can’t wait ‘til I say: “Let’s begin!”
When I’m hit... by my demons
Now I know... how to free ‘em ‘cause:
I DM!
VERSE 2:
Comparin’ is done. The job is showing up.
Deciding what to do with time that’s given us.
I want to DM! And that means I'm enough!
To share the stories we’ve all got in us!
{HOOK}
{CHORUS}
{INSTRUMENTAL BREAK}
Was unqualified when I began to lead you!
I had lows and highs the same as queens do!
But I’ve realized in books and dreams, too!
A wizard arrives just when she means to!
I DM, I DM! I… D… M…!
Y’all can’t wait ‘til I say: “Let’s begin!”
When I’m hit... by my demons
Now I know... how to free ‘em ‘cause:
I DM, I DM! I… D… M…!
We’re our own heroes so let’s be ‘em!
Gonna keep on believin’
That I’m here for a reason… ‘cause:
I DM!
A wizard arrives precisely when she means to.
|
Amy Vorpahl Los Angeles, California
Amy Vorpahl is an actor, writer, Dungeon Master and songstress! She has been playing D&D since college, and her music is inspired by her many experiences at the table. Amy has written D&D modules for Official D&D (WOTC), Dungeon in a Box, and you can see her DM-ing various places online or through a window from the bushes outside her gaming friend's house! ... more
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